There’s No Joy in Darkness

 

Hello. It’s only me. Is there anybody out there? Can anyone hear me? I’m on the flip side of heaven, the other side of hell. I’m existing in no man’s land of purgatory, languishing in limbo, slowly wasting away the days through constant stormy weather. Suffering under dark clouds hovering over me, a downpour of rainy days and relentless winter blues.

 

Does someone else feel my pain or understand the fear and anxiety that tortures my head on a daily basis?  I pray to a God that I barely have faith in, in the faint hope that someone or something out there in the universe hears my cry for help. I simply just wish for my luck to change.

 

I’m sick of pretending to be in a happy place when in all honesty, I’m breaking down and falling apart on the inside. I’m lost and disillusioned. I’m losing the race and close to giving up. I have no strength to keep fighting this battle.

 

Life is passing me by at such lightning speed while my own tiny sphere has stalled. I don’t fit in within this ‘dog eat dog’ world. I want to scream, I want to shout, but there’s no one to turn to. I want to cry, but I’ve run out of tears. I’m running on empty and my soul is broken.

 

I wish things were different. I yearn for my life to finally head in the right direction. I’d love to get back on track, for my hopes to go to plan and for my dreams to come true. I miss that feeling that anything was possible…that I can conquer the world.

I just want to be happy….

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10 thoughts on “There’s No Joy in Darkness

  1. Pingback: There’s No Joy in Darkness | THE VIBE 101

  2. Only you, you say? Only you? But you are a vibrant and articulate soul! Dynamic and adaptable; relaxed in the sun, sturdy in the wind. This darkness…this purgatory. It’s trying to surround you like a damp fog, trying to cage you in, to blot out your light. But, it is weak, and you are strong. Your light continues to shine through, I see it, I see you — we all see you!

    You say that you are in a land where no other man resides? Good. You can be the first. Be our Columbus, be the guiding light for future travelers — brave soul. It will be arduous, oh how it will be arduous! Just know, that if you stumble, if you fall. We will be there to catch you, to pick you up. We will be there to mend your wounds and to redress your armor, so that you may march on.

    So, no. No, I do not hear “only” you. I hear you. Wonderfully unique, you.

    • oh my gosh, your response made me cry….happy tears. Thank you so much for your kind, positive words. Very inspiring. I’m very humbled. I’m so thankful for taking the time to write such thoughtful advice and encouragement. I wish you nothing but good vibes and fabulous blessings. xxx

  3. Anything is possible… and you can conquer the world. I know it’s hard, but don’t stop believing in yourself. I hope you find a sense of happiness soon. Don’t be afraid to seek help if you need it xx

  4. Beautifully written. Your honesty, self-awareness and courage demonstrated in this post are proof that you are strong enough to conquer this struggle. I can definitely relate to it, thank you for sharing.

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